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Tuesday, March 25, 2008

Dog Prays to God: “Good God! Good Dog!”

Dog and God
Can a dog pray to God? Does God answer a dog?

One dog owner has found it more than coincidence that ‘dog’ is ‘God’ backwards and is arguing for great theological significance and dogged divinity status.

Another author has been sniffing this same connection and is now turning their book into a movie called God the Dyslexic Dog.

Canine Testimony
Associated Press has just posted this news of a dog that prays to God:

“At a Zen Buddhist temple in southern Japan, even the dog prays. Mimicking his master, priest Joei Yoshikuni, a 1 1/2-year-old black-and-white Chihuahua named Conan joins in the daily prayers at Naha's Shuri Kannondo temple, sitting up on his hind legs and putting his front paws together before the altar.

It took him only a few days to learn the motions, and now he is the talk of the town.

‘Word has spread, and we are getting a lot more tourists,’ Yoshikuni said Monday.

Yoshikuni said Conan generally goes through his prayer routine at the temple in the capital of Japan's southern Okinawa prefecture (state) without prompting before his morning and evening meals.

‘I think he saw me doing it all the time and got the idea to do it, too,’ Yoshikuni said.
The priest is now trying to teach him how to meditate.
Well, sort of.
‘Basically, I am just trying to get him to sit still while I meditate,’ he explained. ‘It's not like we can make him cross his legs.’”

Dog Prayers
Perhaps Catholic dogs might be better at crossing their legs but if this goes beyond postures and paws whatever might a dog be saying to God? Someone has created this sample of canine queries and intercessions:

Dear God:
Why do humans smell the flowers, but seldom, if ever, smell one another? How can they get to know one another?

Dear God:
When we get to heaven, can we sit on your couch? Or is it still the same old story?

Dear God:
Why do you have cars named after the jaguar, the cougar, the mustang, the colt, the stingray, and the rabbit, but not ONE named for a dog? How often do you see a cougar riding around in a car? We dogs do love a nice car ride! Would it be so hard to rename the “Chrysler Eagle” the “Chrysler Beagle”?

Dear God:
If a dog barks his head off in the forest and no human hears him, is he still a bad dog?

Dear God:
We dogs can understand human verbal instructions, hand signals, whistles, horns, clickers, beepers, scent ID's, electromagnetic energy fields, and Frisbee flight paths. What do humans understand?

Dear God:
More meatballs, less spaghetti, please.

Dear God:
Are there mailmen in Heaven? If there are, will I have to apologize?

Dear God:
Let me give you a list of just some of the things I am praying about to be a good dog:
1. I will not eat the cats' food before they eat it, or after they throw it up.
2. I will not roll on dead seagulls, fish, crabs, etc., just because I like the way these dead things smell.
3. I will not munch on "leftovers" in the kitty litter box, although they are tasty.
4. The diaper pail is not a cookie jar.
5. The sofa is not a face towel. Neither are Mom and Dad's laps.
6. The garbage collector is not actually stealing our stuff.
7. My head does not belong in the refrigerator.
8. When the officer reaches in for Mom's driver's license and registration, I will not bite his hand
9. I will not play tug-of-war with Dad's underwear when he's on the toilet.
10. Sticking my nose into someone's crotch is an unacceptable way of saying "hello".
11. I don't need to suddenly stand straight up when I'm under the coffee table.
12. I must shake the rainwater out of my fur before entering the house --- not after.
13. I will not throw up in the car.
14. I will not come in from outside and immediately drag my butt across the carpet.
15. When we have company, I will not sit in the middle of the living room and lick my crotch
16. The cat is not a “squeaky toy”, so when I play with him and he makes that noise, it's usually not a good thing.

And, finally, my last question:

Dear God: Why do humans only have 10 Commandments but dogs have 16?

P.S. Dear God: When I get to Heaven may I have my testicles back? Please?

Image: One-and-a-half-year old Chihuahua dog 'Conan' prays with his owner and chief priest Joei Yoshikuni during a morning pray at the Shuri-Kannondo temple in Okinawa islands, southwestern Japan, Monday, March 24, 2008. (AP Photo courtesy of Itsuo Inouye)