Man Keung Ho, in Building a Successful Intermarriage, makes use of the Chinese word ting (listen) to explain the complexity.Ting (pictured) is a composite of four vital parts: the ear, mind, eye and the heart.
The ear is necessary for hearing the words spoken;
The eye, for seeing the message conveyed by the body;
The mind, for interpreting the meaning of what has been seen and heard;
And the heart, for being able to feel what is wanted and needed from the relationship.
Sources:
Man Keung Ho, Building a Successful Intermarriage between Religions, Social Classes, Ethnic Groups or Races (St. Meinrad, IN:St. Meinrad Archabbey, 1984), 98.
This commentary and retelling is found in:
Dugan Romano, Intercultural Marriage: promises and Pitfalls (London: Nicholas Brealey Publishing, 2nd Edition, 2001), 132-133.
Dr. Geoff Pound
Image: Ting (Listen).